Earthy-Quaky-Calishaky or What to Do When the Earth Feels like Doing the Mambo

Dear Blog,

Just in case you didn't know, we had a pretty big quake (no, not SHAKE) on Easter Sunday around 4 pm. And just like in the old days, when people used to write poems, or songs to subdue the Gods' anger that sent natural disasters to Earth, here I am writing my own blog-one needs to keep updated- trying to make peace with the aftershocks. It won't rhyme, and I'm not sure the bottom of the earth will be impressed with these notes. However, I need to do it, it will make me feel better at night when the bed will start shaking--due to external causes, i.e.

Dear fellow Californians. Here's how you don't get yourselves killed whenever the Earth feels like doing the Mambo again.


1). Always put ur headphones on while jogging. It's always good to listen to music while the Earth is dancing.


2). If you have a dog and she really wants to get out even if you just took her out 10 mins ago, rest assured she has read the "Tips for Earthquake Safety" manual in a previous lifetime, when she was a God. She knows it's far safer outside than in the bathtub (unless she had too many Easter eggs and prefers her diarrhea in the grass rather than in the bathtub).


3). If you're in the house, don't hide under the desk. Even if you have your newly bought Ipad on it, don't think God is going to spare it (and you hiding under it) just because you just spent 700 dollars on a gadget that you don't really need.


4). If you have premonitory powers and you're looting some house, make sure you pick a wooden building. If it collapses, large survival voids are created. You won't get that iPad lying on the desk and you'll go to prison, but hey, you'll be alive.


5). If you're in bed dreaming when IT happens, just curl off the bed and lie on the floor. Don't forget ur blanket! If you happen to be a very composed person and you fall asleep during IT, a blanket will prevent a nasty cold.


6). Don't go on the stairs even if you like having a good smoke. The stairs are the most dangerous place to be during a quake.



7). If you feel IT coming while u're in ur vehicle, get out asap and lie down next to ur vehicle. There's nothing funny in this note. Unless truth is.



While IT happened, I wasn't that scared. Maybe because my hubby and a friend was around, the sun was shining and my bean and lentil jars didn't fall off the shelves, they only wiggled. At night, however, when the first, the second, the third and the fourth aftershocks came, I really got shaky. I couldn't sleep that well al night, so my mind was trying to keep busy. In the morning it came up with this realization. We see the grass grow, the trees stand, the birds fly, the people jog, play with a ball, drive etc. We think we actually tread on firm ground. But, hey, it's a ball of fire we're actually 'lying' on. Oh, no, I don't even want to get into strings or waves or other much more complicated to visualize models of existence. Earthy-Quaky-Calishaky is awe-inspiring enough and pretty much cures me of asking myself too serious questions. While IT happened, I wasn't that scared. Maybe because my hubby and a friend was around, the sun was shining and my bean and lentil jars didn't fall off the shelves, they only wiggled. At night, however, when the first, the second, the third and the fourth aftershocks came, I really got shaky. I couldn't sleep that well al night, so my mind was trying to keep busy. In the morning it came up with this realization. We see the grass grow, the trees stand, the birds fly, the people jog, play with a ball, drive etc. We think we actually tread on firm ground. But, hey, it's a ball of fire we're actually 'lying' on. Oh, no, I don't even want to get into strings or waves or other much more complicated to visualize models of existence. Earthy-Quaky-Calishaky is awe-inspiring enough and pretty much cures me of asking myself too serious questions. So instead of asking, I'll just go ahead and try to BE THERE. Whenever the Earth feels like doing the Mambo. I'll Mamboearth along, i.e.



Thanks to Doug Copp, the Rescue Chief and Disaster Manager of the American Rescue Team International (ARTI).

Where are you now?

I'm daring you dear God, dear Being, Flower or whatever you like to be called. It's 9 o'clock and I'm daring you to give me ur wise thought pill. I have my glass of water ready. I'm reticent. I'm wondering if it's at all fair to force you to confide in me. What if you're holding a loud speaker to your mouth and I'm there in the audience all deaf and blind. Coz I want this pill to be natural. I don't want to write literature. I don't want to sound funny, philosophical, pretentious. I want a 100% organic, naked truth wisdom pill.

9:15. I'm tired and I have a headache is the only truth I can hear at the moment.
"Is that ALL or you think it's the most I can handle today?"I ask starting to drink from the water.
"Tell me one thing that made you happy today", I hear a blue, clear voice addressing me.
So he does talk, I'm thinking. I take another sip and hurry on coz u never know how long meetings without appointment last.
"Well, I went to Mission Bay Park and I saw nice kites, and seagulls eating french fries; and a dog snatched a duck and it hurt her, but we can't blame the dog, he was just being playful; and then, there were lots of people barbecuing, a bunch of crows were playing Frisbee and some people volleyball; kids were bathing and splashing; pelicans were fishing; dogs were wagging their tails, and people were wagging their dogs..it was a concert of joy. It was almost too good to be true. The only bad thing was the lack of toilet paper in the restrooms, but it didn't really bother me as I always carry Kleenex with me, and truth of the matter is there were lots of people in the park. I was actually happy about their choice to use the facilities rather than recycle all that Palm Sunday beer and soda in Mission Bay."
"So you spent a lovely afternoon there", the voice says.
"Yes, but when I got home to my overheated apartment, I had a scary thought. What if all that merry celebration was only a product of my mind? I almost ran to the car determined to go see if it was all still there, intact."
"Did you?''
"No, I was too afraid to see kites lost in the sky, sea gulls sick because of too much cholesterol, kids crying that their pampers were full, the injured duck having a bad limp. You know, all that."
"Was there anyone with you to testify for the happiness in the park?"
"No", I sighed.
"But now, when you look back, were you happy in the park?"
''I don't know anymore. I'm not there anymore."
"Where are you now?"

I frown and lift my glass but there's no more water inside.

Piano(d)rama

Who should be educated first, parents or children?

12 pm sharp.
Every day.
Downstairs apartment.

3 year-old Korean whining. Firm Korean mother restating in sharp Korean idiom the task to be performed. Glassware thrown on the floor. Korean grandma chiding. The first angry bangs on the beast. Doors slamming. The kid is a strong one. Korean mother and grandma reprimanding. Korean mother sampling nice Chopin appetizer. Sobbing, sobbing. Banging, banging. A tricycle and a ball flying out the door. Howling, howling. Small hearts, big hearts--broken.

Korean grandpa and Korean kid hand in hand. Korean kid hopping on the tricycle, grandpa holding the handle, kid licking a popsicle.

The beast is dead.

STOP signs are there for a reason.

At the end of the day the question should be not how much I accomplished, but how much I was present at all times.

Dear Blog,

If you ever need a lift and have the guts to ask me to drive you to an IT conference, please forcefully remind me (elbows work fine) of the fact that STOP signs are there for a reason. The other day, just as I boldly and spontaneously made the resolution to choose being present over achieving something--and declared it publicly with the same spontaneity and boldness on Facebook--I almost got myself into a car accident on campus, fat, yellow speed breakers notwithstanding. Luckily, when I saw another car already engaged in traffic and heading with distinct precision towards wherever I happened to be heading, I chose to hit the accelaration pedal and avoid a collision that, according to all laws of physics, was written in the stars (I consulted my personal astrologer later on and he confirmed that Saturn was wreaking havoc in my house). Not that my car would have been surprised should something have happened. She already knows what the lips of a Mercedes, Toyota or Nissan taste like. My car has a PHd in The Nature of Impermanence with a concentration on With this driver, it's not worth getting me fixed. Can't help but wonder, though. Was it life's ironic way of reminding me that making resolutions is not really what this concert of randomness is really about, in other words that I was merely lucky to get to my meeting intact and on time? Or was it really an act of presence that saved me.

A wise pill thought a day keeps the mind doctor away

Dear Blog,

I'm starting a new thing. Instead of the sleeping pills I'm taking every night (which I'm not taking, but it's so trendy I can't help pretending), I'll have Mind squeeze a spark of wisdom from one of its many, untapped 3/4ths cabinet files. 9 o'clock pm sharp. It'll be a sort of pascalian (was it?) challenge to prove the existence of eternal truth in us.

So here's what came out tonight, out of nowhere, not related a bit to Amanda Filipacchi I was reading:

I'm waiting eagerly for the day when having no expectations will be my only life expectation.

A caveat (a day keeps high expectations away): cannot guarantee they will all be wise. You can always throw eggs at me, in case they're not. Shoes are also fine, but please provide a pair, 8 (US), 26 (Europe). Hate shopping anyway.